Round 4- ding ding ding

Today is day 8 after chemo, and I am feeling pretty good... and as I write this I feel like I need to KNOCK ON SOME SERIOUS WOOD- MAYBE EVEN A LARGE TREE - in hopes that it stays this way.   No chest cold this time, I have my voice- yeah!, minimal hot flashes (must've been a mini-menopause), nausea is controllable.. only 'new' thing is some joint and bone pain but it's not too bad  (althought i am VERY Tired as expected, they say that part is cumulative, but hey, I love to nap!). While I am in still in the middle of round 4, I am surprised how well it's going. Even this week it still feels surreal that I am 'in chemo' but the great news is that I am two-thirds done!  

I have chemo on June 9th (last day of school, so bummer there as I'll miss some of the fun) and then June 30th will be my last one.  And it's finally in round 4 that I REALLY took it easy; I slept a TON, read a few books, relaxed as much as I am able to, and took much needed time off work for recovery.  If you've talked to anyone who's gone through a 6 cycle chemo, many say round 4 is a biatch, so I am relieved that I was somewhat spared (again, heading outside to knock on the large conifer in my yard...).  In all honesty, this week was a little challenging; I had a tiny bit of a pity party earlier in the week (Mr Brian can provide details on that if interested); it was mainly just me being sick of 'being sick' from chemo, but now that I am coming out of the chemo brain haze, I am psyched to see the light at the end of tunnel on this chemo crap.  CHEMO BRAIN, as it's called, is for real!  Earlier on I was comparing it to 'pregmentia' but it's really beyond that and is worsening as I go further into the treatments.  For several days I have severely diminished comprehension and analytical abilities, and am completely unable to focus on anything.  As a self proclaimed queen of the multi task in normal times, it's amazing how I can't focus on anything these days. Needless to say, the kids are taking full advantage and are outsmarting me on all fronts.  Luckily the intense part of chemo brain only lasts for 4 or 5 days.  I am told, however, that the lingering effects can go on for up to 10 years, so there is my permanent excuse for everything I forget and mess up til I turn 50- ha ha ha.

June is a big month for everyone and particularly for us it seems!  In addition to summer break starting, I am so excited that my brother and sister and their families are coming in town in mid June.  Jim, Chris and the kiddies come in from Colorado on or around the 15th, and then Tara, Dave and Baby Fiona the following week.  They are coming to see moi and to celebrate the baptism of Fiona.  We are all VERY EXCITED to see them all and to meet the baby- June is going to be AMAZING!

I have much on tap in July to celebrate being done with my chemo! My second true love, Bono, is in town with his crew and we have VIP tickets- giddeee up!  then 4th of July- a big family favorite- and I plan to wear a red white and blue wig this year (anyone have one I can borrow ??!!!??)   Then we head to our little piece of heaven outside of Saugatuck in mid July- I CANNOT WAIT for that trip this year- more so that usual. I hope all the regulars recognize me with my new look.  Then comes the big day- July 22nd- I turn THE BIG 4-0!  I didn't anticipate being bald at 40, but hey, I am here and celebrating so I will not complain! (and mark your calendars for my big 41 party in 2012!). For any of you turning 40 with hair, really, do you have anything to complain about?! joking of course! embrace 40- I plan to!  For my birthday, we have secured the Ward family cub tickets for July 22nd, so we are FINALLY taking the kids to Wrigley Field (again, need that red and blue wig!).  We are also spending 3 days in the city doing the tourist thing which we love to do.  

Back to the little pity party I mentioned above... what really helped me pull out of that this week was the amazing friends, family and community that are supporting me. I am continually amazed at how kind, thoughtful and generous people are, and continue to be, each day. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for all the wonderful meals and the groceries! And for all the unexpected surprises and gestures that seem to arrive daily here! If it wasn't for all of you, we'd have cereal and sandwiches each night; and I'd be a very cranky mommy.  The meals have been amazing- and I look forward to trying out some of your recipes when I am back in action.  Simple words cannot express my gratitude.  

The human spirit is larger than i ever imagined possible.  There is kindness and greatness all around us. And life can be so short, often times too short.  I lost a cousin this week, someone who always stood out in my mind as a shining light in our world. He went suddenly, and words cannot express the sadness I feel for his wife and children.    As a little kid I idolized this cousin, and was amazed at how talented he was, and I loved to see him at family gatherings and listen to him play the piano.  I wish now that I had told him how I felt, and I hate that I missed the chance.  He will be missed.  

That's What Friends are For- Thanks Dionne!

So who knew that Dionne Warwick could make me cry ?!?!?!  That was Mother's Sunday morning at the Y-Me race in Grant Park.  As part of the opening ceremonies, team Mickie Longstocking, 100+ strong, was invited to help initiate an audio flash mob.  I was so excited for the audio flash mob, and thought the song choice was iffy when I first heard it... they chose Dionne Warwick's "That's What Friends Are For".  But then there I was at the pre-race gathering bawling like a baby by the end of the song, singing armn in arm with my mom, cousins, family & friends from all stages of my life. The words in that song rang so true to me, particularly at this moment in my life.  But crying aside, IT WAS AN AMAZING DAY at the Y-ME RACE!  I had a most fabulous Mother's Day and was touched by all the Pippi's that came out to support me. We had gorgeous weather to do the walk and run, along with 30,000 of our closest friends. And they raised over $3million!  Our Mickie Longstocking team raised almost $11,000- Thank you so much for joining me in fundraising for this great cause!  

The week before the Y-Me race was a rough one- it was just following my 3rd round of chemo on April 28th.  Round 3 made the first two rounds look like a cake walk, and I was pretty much down and out for the full week.  I am hoping it was the outlier, and my final three chemo treatments will be better, but time will tell.  Aside from the normal chemo symptoms, round 3 had added bonuses.  I developed a chest cold due to my immunity being compromised, and then lost my voice for nearly a week!  Having no voice made it hard on all fronts... the kids ran wild, I couldn't communicate with anyone on the phone, could barely talk at the Y-Me race... needless to say, I am happy to have it back!  BUT the BIG KICKER was the intense hot flashes & sweating I had all week!  At first I thought I was getting sick, maybe the flu, maybe a fever, but I wasn't running a temperature. When I saw my doctor that week for my weekly infusion, I learned I was in fact having hot flashes; included in the 10 page list of potential side effects of chemo is  temporary early menopause, and I wasn't lucky enough to skip that one.  Going through darly menopause at 39 is NOT going to make the final list of Silver Linings for sure! The hot flashes have subsided, but I am not pleased with this latest development, but I am told it's usually temporary and I'll get to go through menopause once again later in life!  All my new side effects, coupled with the usual fatigue, nausea, dry mouth, dry skin, and acne, I was having a VERY ROUGH week.

Even on Mother's Day morning I still didn't have much of a voice, but I woke up in a FABULOUS mood and was excited to get to the race village. At 6:30 am the Moore's left their hotel and we made our way across the loop to Grant Park.  I was shocked to see the swarms of people all over the Y-Me village that early in the morning.  Elated, overwhelmed, nervous, excited.....I felt a rush of emotions as I walked through the Y-ME village to find my tent..... I had to stop for a moment to soak it all in, take a few deep breaths and muster up some MOXIE to embrace the day!   And what an AMAZING DAY it was!!
When we arrived at the Mickie Longstocking tents we were greeted by tons of friend, family and neighbors who had all made the early morning trek to walk with us- it was an amazing feeling walking down the row of tents towards the row marked "Mickie Longstocking"with that surreal feeling coming on again that all this was 'really happening', that I really do have quite a journey ahead of me still, and I am finally featured on a t-shirt, with my name on signs hanging above, but not quite for what one would imagine typically.   After the I'd had, this gathering of support gave me just the boost I needed to lift my spirits.  I had people that flew in to spend the morning with me, cousins that drove several hours to be there, surprise guest appearances from college friends.....and a sea of Mickie Longstocking shirts.  I had no idea so many people had ordered them!!  My cousin Lisa made the Mickie Longstocking t-shirts, and they look so much like me that zazzle sold over 75 of them.  Add in the orange wigs and braids, and we were a silly looking group.

The race route was packed.  I walked a speedy 30 minute mile, over 90 minutes to do the full 3 miles, mainly due to crowds, to continually stopping to take pictures, having to find my kids & hubby, and stopping to greet late arrivals.  Afterwards a lot of us stayed around and cracked open coolers and snacks, and had a picnic at 9:30 in the morning, soaking in the sunshine in the middle of Grant Park.  The last few stragglers headed over to Milennium Park to get into the water there.  And my cousin Mary who came in from Florida got to see the famous 'Bean'.

As of today, Sunday May 15th, I am feeling pretty good. I am still more tired than usual, but my voice is back, my chest cold is almost gone, and I'll get 4 or 5 days of feeling pretty good before round 4 comes this Thursday.  My dear friend Jen Clarke is coming in town to go with me for chemo, so that will be a ton of fun to hang with her and catch up in person!  Can't wait to see you Jen!!!!

Below are some photos of the Y-Me race, and a whole ton can be found at these sites below too.  Check out how adorable Brian is in his orange braids; those were to be Maggie's but she was not happy being woken up early and didn't wear them, so like a trooper, Brian 'went Pippy' with me!  Check out all the other Pippys in those photos- how fun are you all??!!!!??!!!!!  
Lots of Thanks and Love for all your Support!!!!!  

I am still seeing my face on t-shirts around town and it really lifts my spirits- THANK YOU does not come close to expressing my gratitude for all the support I've received.

PHOTO LINKS:
http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=oa.214826178542297

http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.2048531257441.2121864.1369242727

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002415752018&sk=photos

And my sister's baby, Fiona Margaret Ritchie- only 1 week old, getting her Pippy look on. I LOVE YOU BABY FI !

And lastly, many have recently asked where "Mickie Longstocking" came from.  Here is some of the text of the email I sent out on my way out the door to my first round of chemo!  

Subject:  Pippy is Ready to Roll!

I am oddly calm this morning, but as they say ignorance is bliss. I am hoping I am one of those lucky ladies who has minimal side effects, but I guess time will tell. As I was getting ready, I attempted to put my hair in a pony tail, but it wouldn't stretch (this was due to my self haircut on Friday; I look like a chia pet when my hair is dry). Then I tried barrettes, and looked like I was Maggie/4. Then I tried clips and all the bathroom had to offer. So instead of washing my hair like a normal person, I have installed two pippy long stocking style braids as I head to battle this biatch! I look utterly ridiculous but maybe that will bring some laughs as folks wonder how this young'in with braids is getting chemo today :)

Think of me- Pippy- as I head to battle.

Mickie